From 195 to 125 Pounds: My Healing and Weight Loss Journey

For years, my weight told a story I didn’t want to face. I wasn’t always 195 pounds. The gain happened slowly — through stress, hormone treatments, emotional eating, sleepless nights, and silent heartbreak. What started as “just a few extra pounds” became something much heavier. And it wasn’t only on my body. It was on my mind, my confidence, and my spirit. Infertility treatments changed my hormones. Grief changed my habits. I turned to food for comfort because it didn’t ask questions. It didn’t remind me of loss. It didn’t judge me. But eventually, I began to feel trapped in a body that didn’t feel like mine anymore. One day, I looked at myself and realized something painful: I was fighting so hard to become a mother that I had stopped taking care of myself as a woman. That was my turning point.

This Wasn’t Just About Weight

Going from 195 to 125 pounds wasn’t about fitting into smaller clothes. It was about reclaiming control. After years of IVF, miscarriage, and emotional stress, I felt powerless. My body had felt like the enemy. Losing weight became symbolic — not of punishment, but of partnership. I decided to work with my body instead of fighting it.

What I Changed

I didn’t crash diet. I didn’t starve myself. And I didn’t chase quick fixes. I started with small promises:

• Drinking more water
• Walking daily
• Sleeping properly
• Reducing processed food
• Managing stress intentionally

I focused on healing my hormones naturally, strengthening my metabolism, and calming my nervous system. I learned that chronic stress can hold onto weight just as tightly as poor eating habits. There were weeks the scale didn’t move. There were moments I wanted to quit. But this time, quitting wasn’t an option — because this journey wasn’t about appearance. It was about survival and self-respect.

The Emotional Weight

As the physical weight dropped, something else lifted too: shame. I stopped hiding in photos. I stopped wearing oversized clothes to disappear. I stopped apologizing for taking up space. Losing 70 pounds didn’t just transform my body — it transformed my mindset. I began to see myself as strong, disciplined, and capable. Not broken. Not defeated.

Healing Was the Real Goal

People often ask, “How did you lose the weight?” The real answer? I decided I was worth saving. I stopped waiting for pregnancy to feel complete. I stopped tying my value to motherhood. I started building a life and body I felt proud of — regardless of the outcome of my fertility journey. 125 pounds wasn’t just a number on a scale. It was proof that even after grief, even after hormonal chaos, even after years of emotional exhaustion — I could rebuild.

If You’re Starting at 195

Maybe your number is different. Maybe your struggle is different. But if you feel stuck, overwhelmed, or disconnected from your body, know this: change is possible. Not overnight. Not perfectly. But consistently. Your body is not your enemy. It is responding to what you’ve been through. Treat it with patience. Work with it gently. And remember — healing and weight loss are deeply connected. I didn’t just lose 70 pounds. I found myself again.